Time and Memories

by- Moriah Dorsch 2008

Reminiscing about all the places I had been. Looking back, not wanting to go forward.

Remembering, wanting to live in those times, to forget about now.

To remember the feel of the dirt on my hands, to remember the scent of flowers in my nostrils.

I wanted to run back to the past where I found peace. To leave the inner turmoil that faced me now.

To be able to go where I found rest instead of of living now just trying to do my best.

But more than just remembering, I wanted to share it with another.

Another who was with me in those moments.

Another who felt the dirt with me, who took in the aroma with me.

Back in those times when we found peace together. In those times when we had rest together.

We shared those days, we shared those moments. We shared the love of just being together.

It didn't matter where. It didn't matter when. We just lived. We were care free and lived in the moment. We didn't fear life or people. We didn't worry about what would happen.

We lived each day as though it was our last. We had no regrets.

Then one day was his last. But I had no regrets.

Only sorrow. Only grief. Missing the one who had shared those moments with me.

That's my only regret, my only sorrow, that he could no longer be by my side.

Now I remember for both of us. I sit on the ground and let the dirt run between my fingers for both of us.

I sit under the lilac bush and drink in the scent for both of us.

I walk down the road and watch the sunset parade across the skies for both of us.

I am almost no longer alone. He walks beside me when I remember for him.

It's almost like he's there remembering with me.

I feel him beside me. I almost feel his hand reaching out to mine.

He's there, but I cannot see him.

He's there, but I cannot smell him.

He's there, but I cannot feel him.

He's there, I can hear him in my memories.

And soon, it won't be just in my memories. I will be with him. And we will walk down the heavenly road hand in hand watching an even more glorious sunset...side by side.